What is it about the connections we have with other people sometimes? Some people can have the biggest impact on our emotional well-being and we don’t even know it until it’s too late. Over the past few days, I’ve had to deal with depression, sadness, anger, stress, and anxiety just to name a few because of the effect that somebody has over me. It happens, I guess, but I hate that I allow it to happen. I’ve been so busy as well, that I haven’t even gotten the chance to allow myself to think and process these emotions. What’s going to come out of them? I don’t know, but it’s affecting my everyday life. I don’t want to feel this way, because I know me. I’m going to make dumb decisions that will affect my life if I don’t allow myself to take a breather and chill. By the way, I should say with that last sentence, I’m not talking about self-harm or anything like that. I’m talking about personal life decisions that will affect me long term.
All I need to do is just hang out through today and into tomorrow afternoon, then God willing I’ll give myself a chance to just let my emotions go and do what they need to do so that I can try and regain peace. Sigh. It seems like every few years after having such a great run emotionally and mentally, I get in to the proverbial violent car crash that makes me have to do build myself back together all over again. I hate having to do this dance over and over again. I’m just tired of it. Who knows? Maybe my luck in my personal life will change for good FOR ONCE soon. I’m not holding my breath. In the meantime, it’s rebuild time coming soon.