Settling in for the Happy Times

Another summer is nearly gone.  Man.  I can hardly believe it.  This year has been such a game changer for me personally.  My schedule has had to change due to personal problems, and because of that, it really threw off my spring and summer.  It almost feels like I really didn’t get 2018 going, actually.  Now to think that it’s pretty much ending has me pondering things.

First thing I’m thinking about is all of the cool things that changed for me emotionally/personally this year.  As I was talking to a friend of mine, I came to the realization that as each day passes, I’m becoming more and more comfortable with who I am.  I know that sounds like I’ve yet to reveal some sort of dark secret or something, but what I mean is that instead of being shy or embarrassed for being nerdy, for being dorky, for being introverted, for being FAT, or for liking the music and movies that I do, I’m putting it all on Front Street now.  I don’t know what changed, or when it really did, but I’m not hiding anything anymore.  I think it’s because I’ve gotten tired of trying to impress people.  It’s the natural thing to do, right?  Putting one’s best features forward generally gets favorable results, amirite?  Well, I’m tired of trying to put my best foot forward for nothing.  I’m just going to be who I completely am.  Awkward and funny, strange and recluse all for anybody who cares to see.  If you don’t like it, cool.  I’m not going to try and keep you around.  I hope that doesn’t come across as standoff-ish or anything, but what I mean is that I’m not going to try and be something I’m not or to try to fit in when I clearly know I don’t.  I don’t need to, really.  To go along with that, even though I’ve been pretty tied up since March with things, I’ve really found the true comfort I’ve always sought in my solitude.  Let me try to explain.  I’ve tried to do my best to have somebody else around, mainly to please others who think that’s what I need.  As you can probably guess, that hasn’t really gone anywhere thanks to those 6 things that I mentioned that are the 3-8 of things of importance/things that define me (1, being God and my relationship with Him, & 2 being friends and family) .  Every now and again whenever I’m doing the most random or mundane things, I tend to get a calming peace that hits me that actually causes me to pause.  I know it’s strange, but I love spending time alone, even if I’m cooking, cleaning, or waiting on laundry (and I actually LOVE doing all of those things).  I love the fact that most of the time, I have nowhere to be, nobody to please, and nothing to do.  I desperately crave that alone time so much and I feel like nobody understands my need for it.

The second thing that was cool this year was the new tech I got.  I hope this doesn’t come across as bragging, but I bought some really cool stuff this year that now I feel has been missing for the longest time.  LOL!  The first new thing I got this year was a PlayStation 4.  Yes, I know, I’m about 5 years too late in getting one, but I’ve finally joined the rest of the band to complete our online stupidity known only as Drunk Fat Man Gaming, where we generally play Grand Theft Auto V and broadcast it on YouTube for our own amusement.  I’ll speak for myself in saying that I’m a lukewarm gamer and I really don’t like to play challenging games, so playing something like GTA V where skill isn’t always a requirement to have a blast is right up my alley.  Added onto that, I’ve found that the PS4 is an all-around entertainment system that has many uses outside of gaming.  I watch HBO shows and movies on that, MLB when the app decides to play nice, and Spotify when I want to listen to albums that I don’t physically have for some dumb reason or another.

Another piece of new tech to go along with that is a new 4K TV that I pulled the trigger on buying about 2 months after I got my PS4.  Now, this thing has changed my life.  I was one of the first people I knew who was on board with HDTV 20+ years ago and I was impressed then, but the advancements that technology has made since then has really blown me away.  Obviously, the picture quality on this thing is nuts!  Even watching things in what looks like “ghetto vision” to me (that’s what I coined SDTV on an HDTV to look like back in the day), which is now 1080i (the new highest quality ghetto vision to me) are amazing to me.  I’ve watched a grand total of 2 things in 4K.  Those were the films Jumanji:  Into the Jungle and Ready Player One, and those things blew me away.  Secondly, the freakin’ TV is a smart TV too, so it’s got apps AND Chromecast built right into it, so instead of watching stuff on Netflix, YouTube, and Vudu on my PS4, I now stream them directly off of the TV instead, which is how I saw those two movies in 4K thanks to Vudu.  Obviously, I got a larger TV than what I had before, so it took a few days for me to really adjust my eyes and how I view the TV, but now I’m cool with it.  Going back a bit to my ghetto vision blast, I’m finding that OG DVDs just don’t cut it on my 4K TV, even with the upconversion from 480p to 1080p on my PS4.  The visual noise on some of my movies is really noticeable and distracting.  Thankfully, most of these movies that I like to watch on DVD are also now available on Blu-Ray and are relatively cheap too, so I’m slowly but surely upconverting some of my favorite titles to that format now.  I know what you’re saying too.  Well, aside from “First world problems, pal!!!!!” is “GET WITH THE TIMES, POP!  WE’RE STREAMING NOW!!!”  BUT!!!  I refuse except for renting films.  I’m a digital old schooler in that I like to have the physical copy of things.  I love buying CDs and I love buying Blu-Ray discs just so that I can have the physical copy, and see the cool artwork and hold those in my hands.  I’m the same way with books.  I need to have an actual book to read.  I can’t read a book off of a computer or my phone.

Another piece of tech that I got is a 15 year old piece of tech, but it’s something that I’ve wanted for a while.  I finally got a Bose SoundDock for my 10+ year old iPod.  I know, I could have gotten a SoundLink, or some other Bose product (if I really had the money, I would have gotten a SoundTouch 30), but to me, the SoundDock systems work the best for my needs.  I needed something that size with that kind of sound to put in my room for the times that I just lay in bed and listen to music and nothing puts out sound like those.  Thankfully, I found one on EBay WITH a carrying case, so I’d be able to take that with my on trips too and have my music with me in hotel rooms.  I did just that on my trip to Oceanside/San Diego & Vegas.  It was the best!  Instead of watching broadcast TV, I was listening to music the whole time and relaxing.  I use my SoundDock every day and I think it’s also made my life better.  I’m not even kidding.  Music is my life and my passion.

So, now with all that said.  What’s next for me?  What are my goals?  My goals are to continue to be me and to have as much fun as possible.  I need to camp more (I’m going next week!).  I need to go to the other things I like to do more.  Go out to the golf courses a lot more and pick that back up.  I need to keep doing the things that make me happy.  I can’t wait.  September is nearly here which means football is back, NASCAR is starting up with the playoffs, and the cool weather will quickly bring in the holiday season and I’m dying for that.  I want a white Christmas.  I want to kick back, drink some coffee or hot chocolate, and watch the snow fall, all while I listen to some kick ass music.  Things are looking up.

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