Forever a Clone

I'm just a clone, talking away while nobody listens

What is and What Could Have Been

Sometimes I wish I had a bit more human interaction so that I can come up with topics to write about because I really do enjoy writing this blog.  But then that would mean I’d actually have to talk to strange and stranger people.  Yeah, never mind.  Heh.  That doesn’t sound like it would be any sort of fun at all.  Not to me at least.  I’m weird, I know.  I’m that weird dude that will go out to a restaurant to eat alone.  The weird dude you see at the bar keeping to himself.  That guy.  That’s me.

Anyway, with the little human interaction that I do get, mainly at work, a certain thought came up.  What would have happened if things would have turned out differently in my youth?  Specifically moving away from my hometown of Anthony, and furthermore my old man choosing a house on the east side of El Paso as opposed to the (shitty) westside.  Yeah, I said it.  Shitty westside.  I really don’t like anything about it, but that’s neither here or there.  Back to the question I posed myself, what would have happened?  I think my life would have been radically different.  I would have never met my very close friends that I have now and God only knows where I would have ended up in my life.  Not that I’m one of those people who dwells on the “what if” factor and whatnot, because I really don’t, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t give it a quick thought.

I think parts of me would have stayed the same.  I know I would have still been a percussionist, but I would have either graduated from Franklin (shuttering at the thought) if my old man had gotten the house we checked out in the westside, or if nothing would have changed and we wouldn’t have moved I would have graduated from Anthony.  Either way, I know my friends wouldn’t have changed as a few of them actually went to high schools in west El Paso anyway.  Who else would I have hung out with?  Would I have joined some rock band like I did in my real life?  I’m sure I would have.  Where would I have gone career wise too?  Maybe things would have ended up differently.

All strange things to think about, but I’m happy that things turned out the way they did.  I still keep in touch, pretty much on Facebook, with a few friends of mine from Anthony (as I lived there from birth to age 11) but I gained some pretty incredible badass friends that I met on the eastside of town.  It’s wild to think that my best friend now is some dude I met for the first time only a few short months after I had moved.  Granted we really didn’t start hanging out until years later, the fact remains that we’ve known of each other’s existence for 25 years.  My other best friends (might as well be brothers) I met only 4 years after that.  Heh, come to think of it, I’m a man who finds comfort and just stays with it.  That explains all of the failed relationships I’ve ever had and every other thing that has happened in my life.  LOL!!!!  The old motto “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” goes a long way in my book.  Sometimes I don’t see that things are completely destroyed before it’s too late and I’m stuck on cleanup duty in the aftermath.  Now, I’m not saying that I should find new friends, I just went on a quick tangent on my ex-girlfriends.  I apologize.  What I’m trying to say is that I really do love how things turned out in my life.  I’ve met the most incredible people, both in real life and online, and although I can look back and wonder how things might have been I’m very happy the way they are now.  I’m 3 weeks away to the day from 36 years old and each day that comes and goes, the happier I am with my life.

That’s it for today, y’all!  I hope you have a badass weekend!  Stay safe and take time out to be thankful for what you got!

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2 thoughts on “What is and What Could Have Been

  1. I think about shit like this all the time. Like what if I didn’t have a kid at such a young age? Where would I be right now? Probably AA or on a stripper pole. Haha. Hope you have a wonderful weekend!

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