I think i’m losing my mind

Well, curiosity has gotten the better of me as of late.  I want to see if I can look like a severe health issue struck me, much like it did with Reverend Gonzo once upon a time.  I’ve already been going to the gym consistently since around October, with the exception of the few days before and after Thanksgiving, the same for Christmas, and when my POS back decided to be a bastard 2 weeks ago.  I’ve also been attempting (not well, mind you) to rock out a low carb diet, as this is the method that has worked with me to lose the weight.  Now, I’ve added another instrument in this experiment of mine.  I’m using the MyFitnessPal app on my Vibrant.  For those that don’t have this thing, it’s pretty insane.  This app tracks your meals of food, water consumption, as well as any cardio work and strength work that you do.  It does some more shit too, but overall, this damn thing is quite evil.  I’m sure this is definitely going to help me out, and with the use of this madness, I can’t wait to really put boots to asses, as Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson says it.

So, here’s the plan… My day is going to start at around 3:35am, I’m going to show up at the gym by 4am, rock out 30 minutes on the elliptical, get home, eat a meal of breakfast food, get ready for work, at lunch walk 30 minutes, then after work do 20-30 more minutes of elliptical and add some weights.  Sounds like I got hit too hard upside my dome, huh?  Not only that, but I bet you’re wondering what the f word is making me do this…

Well, I’ll tell you this.  It’s a mixture of two things.  Spaceballs 2 is one of them.  I’m going to be joining up with a weight loss contest at my ol’ man’s workplace that will pay me a gangload of cash money for losing the most.  Secondly, I’m pretty curious to see how I look like a twink.  ROTFL!  Ok, I fucked myself up with that shit, but seriously.  I haven’t been thin and whatnot since I was around 7 years old.  That was 24 years ago.  That’s a long time to fuck around.  I figure it’s about time to see how many people I can terrify when they see me again for the first time, much like what happened to me with Gonz those few years ago. 

So, with that said, I’m going to start my journey in honest starting today.  I have to take it easy at the gym as we’re going to play a show tomorrow night, but I’m already planning on making up for it by doing at least 30 minutes on the elliptical on Saturday and Sunday.   I’m also sorry to make this blog entry as a fucking fat club, biggest loser, whatever you wanna call it blog, but I thought I might as well talk my shit here so that you can bust my bawls if you find me fucking up on this schedule.

What do you think?  Am I insane?

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