Welcome to the REAL world
So, Lunchbox, T.W. McMeatwhistle, and I were at the gym this afternoon, as been the usual lately, when T.W. and I filled in the conversation we were having at work about playing at a venue here in town to Lunchbox, it was brought up that I am a Negative Nancy/Debbie Downer. Of course, in quick fashion, I cooked up a response as per my custom, and attempted to explain myself. It didn’t go over so well, or rather it fell on deaf ears. See, what some people perceive as being negative, I see as being a realist and seeing shit for what it is. Call me crazy, but this is not a happy world we live in. Life sucks. That’s the fuckin’ truth, my friends. I don’t see how some people can’t see it.
I will admit, some people have it pretty fuckin’ sweet. I’m not going to be dumb and say they don’t, but the majority of people aren’t so lucky. I happen to be at the bottom of the barrel of the unlucky. That’s the way I see it, because that’s the way it is. Why bullshit myself? I have too many examples to count to back up my argument. It does nothing but cause more pain when reality comes knocking to remind myself of the reality that is life. I hope you don’t take what I’m saying like I’m suicidal again or that I’m feeling sorry for myself and want pity. That’s not it. I’m just saying that I know my place in this world. I’m not a leader. I don’t think I inspire anybody, nor do I want anybody to blow shit up my ass and try to inspire me. I keep my head down, and keep on moving. I see things for what they are. If that means I don’t try and pretend that something will happen if I hope hard enough, then so be it. I’ve learned ten times over… fuck hope. LOL. Funny to me, and true. Again, I’m just going through with the motions and trying to keep in the shadows. I know my place. I just try and use the time I have and bury myself in the things that make me happy. Stuff like music, podcasts, movies, daydreaming about things I’ll never have, and lusting to holiday in my favorite places keep me happy… not the hand that was dealt to me in this world. I suppose that’s how I bullshit myself now that I think about it. Who knows? Maybe I’m the idiot.