Forever a Clone

I'm just a clone, talking away while nobody listens

Adventures in and out of Dreamland

I thought for this blog entry that I’d share my strange experiences in the adventure of sleep and consciousness over this weekend.  I really don’t know what the fuck it was, but I really wanted to nap the hell out when I got home from work on Friday afternoon.  I usually get home around 4:35 from work, which I did on that day, and I was in bed by 5.  I was thinking that I’d nap it out for a good two hours, which is my customary length my brain needs to recharge on a nap, but instead I found myself waking up at 9:30 really rested, yet confused as to what the hell had happened.  I was fucking Rip Van Winkle!  It was pretty wild.  I felt like I should have been awake for something, although, I really couldn’t figure out what that something should have been. 

As I’ve stated before, I really don’t have any kind of life aside from my local gym visits, MNF at Studio 6b, band practices, gigs, and the rare occasion I decide to go hit golf balls out at my favorite golf course.  Don’t feel sorry for me because I actually prefer my life that way.  Wait a minute.  Fuck it!  Feel sorry for me that I’m an antisocial shut in.  LOL.  Life just works out better for me that way.  I’ve always been like that, to be honest.  Strange, I know.

Anyway, back to my tale from this weekend, 9:30 came along, and I kinda felt like I was missing out on something.  After realizing that I really didn’t, I got to catching up on things, mainly twitter, to get some laughs.  The hours passed, and before I knew it, it was 5am.  Where the hell had the time gone?  More importantly, why the fuck was I awake in the first place?  I could understand if I should have been in the crowds at some bar getting intoxicated like everybody else does in this city, then making that late night trip to Whataburger (still way the fuck better than In n’ Out, Rev), Chicos (if one made it with enough time), TC (like some chick at the Wells Fargo I used to go to daily with my previous gig called it) aka Taco Cabana (I prefer this.  Sounds 99.7% less douchebag than fucking TC), or one of the diner chain joints… but nope!  I was at home, in my room, staring at Krayshawn chief it up on UStream, and uploading Searchlight Needles shit onto my YouTube account.

So, 5am rolls around, and I decided that being awake all night for no good reason should come to an end.  I passed out, but for some God unknown reason, there I was again awake at 7:30ish.  My brain decided to be an asshole and give me a two hour nap instead of a full sleep.  Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, fucking brain!!!???  Fuck it, I was awake, so I went ahead and acted as if I had slept all night and got to wasting my day in delight as usual.  I was, however, waiting for my 14 day early birthday present from Control Industries… my new Steel Panther merch.  I also had to go to Little Dude’s birthday party, so I was hoping that Mr. Postman would hit up my domicile early enough to go to the festivities.  Thankfully, homeboy did, so I was out to Charles Entertainment Cheese’s empire of pizza for some fun times trying to piss off the Pentecostal Christians.  Fun, fun, fun!  I went light on the asshole though, and wore my Star Wars Galactic Empire logo shirt in all black hoping that they would start shit with me.  It was only because I was the uncle of the kid we were there for that they didn’t start shit, the fuckers.  The entire time I was there I was fucking sleepy.  I knew why, but what the hell?!  It was my brain’s fault for being an idiot, right?

In the cool moment of the day, I was able to hang out with my cousin, who for the time being lives in Colorado Springs.  I really miss her.  She’s a badass.  She’s always been the second rebel of the family.

Well, sleep be damned, but I hit up my uncle’s house to hang out with her and my other cousins after laundering my new Steel Panther shirts and wearing one to the house.  I was exhausted, although I had two 30 minute power naps, but this was the last night my cousin would be in town, so I had to nut up and go.  Good thing that I did too.  We had a good time, but there I was, passing out while attempting to watch a really kick ass film. 

I made it home at 2am, and promptly went to sleep.  I was thinking that I’d pass the f word out until around 10 or so, but nope!  8am and guess who’s awake?!  My dumb ass.  What the effing fuck, man?!  It was at this point that I was thinking something was up.  First I had hypersomnia, followed by a fun case of insomnia and now I was just fucked.  Strange times.  Well, I decided to roll with it and I did for a good 3 hours until Mr. Sleep started tickling my bathing suit area and I was out again at noon.  Horrible.  Thankfully, I only passed out until 2, but when I did wake up I was tired as hell.  All I wanted to do was sleep, but I knew I had to hold out until at least 8pm.  I don’t know how, but I did it.

At this point, I started playing Dr. Dickhead and began to self diagnosing my problems, where I figured out that yea, I had hypersomnia, insomnia, followed by narcolepsy, then a bit more of insomnia, and now it was just fucking space madness.

I passed out around 9, but the fun didn’t end there.  I woke up again at 11!  Another What the French, Toast moment!!!  I said fuck it and put on another podcast and called it a night for the remaining 4 hours of sleep time I had.

I’m now hoping that this craziness is over with.  Not that I don’t like to sleep, but for fucks’ sake!  Not like this, I don’t like sleeping.  As it is, I have a hard enough time to remember what the hell day it is… I can only imagine how out of it I would be if this sleeping madness would continue.  Looks like I’ll find out tonight!


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